Where are you Christmas?

Tonight as I was taking my sweet little niece and nephews home a Christmas song came on the radio.  Kaelee, my niece who is 13 turned up the radio so she could here it.  It was the song from the Grinch who Stole Christmas "Where are you Christmas".  I brought back a memory of a Christmas party where I had made Kaelee stand up and sing it in front of a ton of people.  What a cute little song it turned out to be.  What a sweet Christmas that was.

As the song went on I couldn't help but think:  This is my Christmas Theme Song.  I fondly remember Christmases that I couldn't wait for them to come, where I was exited about everything.  This year I didn't even hang a Christmas ornament.  I feel like so much has been going on that I haven't had the time to enjoy Christmas.  I spent one day shopping and that wasn't even shopping really.   I didn't even get Christmas cards out this year. 




As hard as it is, I realize that Christmas isn't all of the things that I put so much stock into.  It isn't about getting the perfect gift or decorating the tree or even the wonderful smells of Christmas.  Christmas is about celebrating the life of my Savior and what he did for me.  It is about spending quality time with those I love, it is about reaching out to those around.  Christmas is about forgetting yourself.   

So to you all... I wish you a Merry Christmas. 

May you have a moment to reflect on the love of the season.

I hope that your heart is touched when you think of all the sweet people who care so much about you, and include me in that list.  

"And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more. "  Dr. Seuss

My Sweet Assurance

I have been so blessed to attend Time Out for Women twice this year.  What a great joy!  Talk about two days of greatness!  

This year the theme for the conference was "Sweet Assurance - the certainty that comes when you know life's truths."

As the meeting comes to a close they encourage us to go home and share our sweet assurances, the truths that we know, no matter what with those around us.  Tonight those around me are...  Well okay just me, so I thought I would share with you hope you don't mind.

My Sweet Assurances:

The Things I know, No Matter What.

•  I know that I am absolutely a daughter of my Heavenly Father who loves me more than I can comprehend.
• I know that He knows my name
• I know that there is something on this earth that only I can accomplish or that I have a divine mission
• I know that because my Father loves me so much He gives me trials that are helping me to remember who I have always been and who I will become
• I know that my Father can still see part of a little 8 year old girl who wanted so badly to be like Jesus, and even when I forget about her He sends me sweet reminders.
• I know that life is sometimes hard.... VERY HARD... and that there is a time to cry and a time to laugh, but as we go through each of those times our Savior is at our side, rejoicing at times and holding us while we cry at others.
• I know that eventually everything will turn out right, even if I can't see that right now.
• I know that I have learned far more about the plan of happiness, the atonement, and My Savior by going through my struggles and trials than I ever have from setting in church.
• I know that when I put my trust in the Lord He will not forsake me, even if I turn my back on him.
• I know that my Father can take my small and sometimes inadequate talents and gifts and multiply them into exactly what I need.
• I know that even if I have enough faith, if I go to the temple everyday (I wish), if I fast faithfully, even all that I possibly can there are somethings that the Lord will not take away or "healings" that will not happen.  
• I know that there are somethings that I am given that I absolutely can not handle on my own, for if I could I wouldn't need the atonement, but I know that with the Saviors help I can handle anything.  
• I know that the plan of happiness was not Plan B, but that it was the first choice, and there is nothing that is happening today that is not surprising to Father in Heaven, and that he sent me here because he knew I could handle it.
• I know that I am going to make it!   

How thankful I am to sweet people who take their time to share thier testimony's with me and who are unselfish enough to allow the spirit to be present in my life.  This year through time out I was able to see a few very direct affects of the atonement in my life as I witnessed several tender mercies that occoured while there.  My testimony was strengthened as my prayers were answered while attending TOFW in Phoenix in that a very dear sweet friend from my past whom I still love dearly but I have hurt very badly had the courage to do one of those hard things in life to stop and talk to me.   Thank you for creating a tender mercy in my life that day.  Bless you!  My prayers were again answered while attending in Salt Lake the spirit spoke to my heart and shared messages that I have been waiting for for a very long time.  I know that life will not always be wonderful and happy, but how thankful I am for the sweet assurances that I do have that will help me make it through those times of struggles.

The Girls

Time Out for Women in Phoenix

Dear Holly -

Dear Holly -

Posting this the night before your birthday because I don't want to miss it.  First and foremost ... Let me remind you.  I am a baby.  I am sitting here at my computer tonight crying.... Two reasons:  1 - Realizing that while last week in my moment of not wanting to live anymore (Thank you swine flu) I forgot to get your card & book (I know you are already dying to know what it is...) in the mail (remember last year it only took me until February), hoping you can forgive me and 2 - When I think about the ways you have blessed my life I can't help but cry. 

"ONE OF THE HARDEST THINGS IN LIFE IS HAVING WORDS IN YOUR HEART THAT YOU CAN'T UTTER"  

~ James Earl Jones

Remember the first time I showed up at your house.  I was there to do my duty as a sad scared little girl who didn't fit in anywhere posing as a visiting teacher.  I was amazed at all of the warmth that was inside the walls of your home - all the wonderful Disney everywhere, and your love of people.   I am pretty sure I didn't say more than two words at that meeting, but that was okay with you.  You still let me come back.  What was greater is the next time you opened your door as a true friend who could see beyond that tough "I'm okay" shell to see the broken heart that I liked to keep hidden.  You didn't ask a million questions or make me tell you my story, you just loved me.  What developed over the next three years has gone down in my book of "super fabulous" things in my life.  "Super Fabulous" are the Thatcher Family, the way that they have let me become part of thier family, the way they have opened up thier home and thier hearts, & "Super Fabulous" the people that they are, and "Super Fabulous" the way they leave you feeling. 

"People love others not for who they are,
but for how they make them feel."

~Irwin Federman.

And so my dear friend Holly.... Today I celebrate with you, even if it is from a million miles away.  Happy Birthday!  I hope this day is filled with the same "Super Fabulous" that you have filled my life with.  For all of the million and one things you do for me, I thank you.  May you have a little pie or cookies or what ever else you choose, (since you don't like cake)  and remember all those like me, whose world is a much better place because Holly Hansen Thatcher has touched it.    

"There are two important days in a woman's life-the day she is born and the day she finds out why."

~ Elaine Cannon

Missing you and wishing that Casper were a little closer tonight.  Celebrate!  You deserve it.

Love,

Bec

Another Testament

Sweet Dreams

 

One day this week I woke up in a particularly foul mood.  I even had the thought...Don't get out of bed, don't do it.  Not today.  The reason for my mood was two fold: First, I had managed to sleep through the alarm for over an hour - something I have been really good at for the last 3 months but trying to overcome. Second, I had just woke up from one of the most rotten dreams I have had in a long time.  - No it wasn't a big spider coming to try to attack me...I would have welcomed that dream over the one I had.   It wasn't the one where you get on the bus before you notice that you haven't got dressed (I stopped having that one a few years ago).  It was just a bad one!

 

As I got ready for work it seemed that nothing was going to go right that day.  My hair would have looked better if I had stuck my finger in the light socket, my clothes which I had pictured fitting me a different way were a painful reminder that I have put on a lot of weight since the last time I went shopping, and to make matters worse I was going to be at least two hours late for work.  I kept thinking you should have stayed in bed!  

All day long I stewed about why I had to have stupid dreams.  I am the kind of person that once an image or idea is placed in my head I will dream about it.  While this has brought great joy for a lot of my family on many occasions because when I dream I talk and live the dream, I absolutly hate it.  I hate how real they become to me.  I hate waking up and not knowing if the dream was a reality.   But, I hadn't thought of the people I was dreaming about or the idea that became my dream for quite a long time and all the sudden there was my dream, robbing me of any hope of a good day.  

As I was driving home after class that night I decided I needed to have a conversation with myself, yes I know I am weird but I do that.  As I was discussing the fact that I had managed to let one stupid dream make me have a terrible day I had an idea hit me like a ton of bricks!  Why waste my time focusing on the negative dreams of life?  

I have had many experciances in life that have proved to me that I can't control everything, and more often than not those have lead to some very sweet experiances as I learned to trust in the Lord and have faith not only in his plan but his timing.  So here I was driving down the freeway talking to myself trying to decide what else to focus on rather than negative dreams.  The thought came - Create good dreams ... Have hope for those good things.  

The conversation continued...What are the good dreams?  No sooner had I got that out of my mouth when I thought of a few things I hope for in my life.  I hope someday to be a mom and not just the least favorite aunt. I hope to be a good role model to the youth that someday I will get to teach. I dream about the days when I have become that truly good person with the good, kind, and loving heart that I dream about being.  But, I must say the sweetest spirit came to me as I thought about the dream that I have for all of those wonderful people in my life who are struggling in thier lives - specifically my brothers.  I have this ongoing dream that someday we will all set down together where we will all be in white, where they will know how much I love them, and where they will know how much our Heavenly Father, and our elder brother, Jesus Christ love them.  I love my brothers so very much.  With this thought came the realization that I have some work to do.  So here it is - I know that the our Loving Heavenly Father can and will use us to bless the lives of others as we turn to Him and seek for his guidance in finding ways to help those who are in need.  I realize that sometimes the things he asks us to do are not easy, but helping those around us is always worth it.  I know that as I do my very best to help my brothers that I will be met with opposition, but I do not want them to ever feel like they are less then the good men that they are - Sons of our Heavenly Father.  

 

When I made it home that night, I couldn't help think of the ways that the Lord teaches me in my life, and how he wants me to be happy.  I am thankful that he has given me the desire to be happy. That night as I went to sleep I wasn't worried about the rotten dream coming back to me.  That dream as well as all the others may come and go, but I can choose to focus on the good dreams of life, and work towards seeing those dreams come true!

 

Sweet Dreams To You All!   

She Thinks She Can Just Leave! & This is the Place

Having a sister is like having a best friend you can't get rid of. You know whatever you do, they'll still be there. ~Amy Li

My Parents, Heather & My niece Ryann came up on Thursday to see me. It was fun to just have Ry here by herself for a few days. On Thursday night we went to see


I have to say I was just a little disappointed with the production, probably because I have been in this play I went in thinking it would be amazing as that. It was fun to remember all of the music and actions that we did during the play.

On Saturday we went to "This is the Place Monument and Heritage Park" - they are right it is so much more than a monument and for future reference - plan on spending all day long there.

You can't not help but have an appreciation for those amazing pioneers who gave their all to come across the plains. I am a firm believer that if I had to be one of those that had to do that they would have tossed me out of the wagon or sicked the wolves on me because of all of the complaining I do! I was amazed at how simple they lived, one cabin smaller than my bedroom was home to 9 people. I can't imagine. It was a great day finished off by a family dinner. Good Times Good Times.

Now for the part I don't want to talk about. The beginning of May my little sister Stef moved up here. I was so exited to have her up her and get to know her again. I will be the first to admit I am terrible at communicating and keeping in touch - even with my family. Stef and I used to not get along very well, and haven't lived close to each other for about 5 years so I was really exited to have her here. I am so thankful that she is a forgiving person. It has been so much fun to have her, and such a blessing at the same time. I am a firm beliver that I needed her to be here for me during this summer, helping me get through all of the stress of mono, helping me learn to not stress so much and to take care of myself better. This morning she left to move back to Queen Creek and I already miss her! I called her during her drive and told her that she needed to come back now.

I am so glad that she came up here. I am thankful for the person that she is, for her giving heart and for everything that she does for my family. She is amazing! I feel so blessed to be part of the family that I am, and to have a little sister who loves me. For Good, Stef ... You Changed My Life for Good.

To the outside world we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other's hearts. We share private family jokes. We remember family feuds and secrets, family griefs and joys. We live outside the touch of time.
~Clara Ortega

My Monolog

One of the guys I work with was giving me grief for coming to work at 2:00pm one afternoon, and he thought he would continue to be funny and tried using the word "mono" as many times in a sentence as he could. I will admit some of them were pretty funny.


At any rate, yes my mono is still here rearing its ugly head. I am now only sleeping about 12 hours a day, but there have been some days when I have slept 23 hours. I keep thinking I am getting better, and really I think I am but not fast enough. I often get frustrated with myself because of all of the things I am not accomplishing just because I can't due to lack of energy. Some days just getting in the shower takes everything I have. I am hoping that I will work at least 15 hours this week, and that will be a big deal. I have been really blessed with a patient boss who is allowing me to do what I can. I feel bad for my little young women and the leaders I serve with. They really should release me and call my little sister. Bless Stefs heart! She has really came in and saved my bacon the last month with my calling. Anytime I need anything done I call her. She was even patient and taught me to backstich.


I have not just been sleeping the last month though, the day before I found out I had mono I bought plane tickets for my Mom and my sweet niece Kaelee to come up and see me from Arizona. Poor Kaelee, she thought it was going to be a fun weekend but instead she had to deal with tired aunt Bec, again thanks to Stef. We did manage to get all of Kaelee's school shopping done, she is such a pretty chica that it was fun to shop with her. Of course everything looks good on her and left me wishing I was skinny again. We also got to go to the temple open house with them. It is such a pretty temple! I hope that the Temple will become an important part of Kaelee's life someday.

The other fun thing I did was take a trip with Stef to Tempe to see Wicked,the Broadway musical with my sisters Shell & Heather & my cousin Lamar. I have wanted to go for years and there was no way I was going to miss it (Especially since I bought the tickets in April) It was a fun weekend. Again, I was the party pooper who slept the whole weekend, but I was glad I went. I was pretty tired during the show and probably didn't enjoy it as much as I could have, but I am glad I went. Maybe someday when I have energy again I will post some of my thoughts about it. My Favorite songs were of course For Good & Defying Gravity.

I hope this finds you all well. Remember to laugh, some days its all we can do.

"Learning to endure times of disappointment, suffering, and sorrow is part of our on-the-job training. These experiences, while often difficult to bear at the time, are precisely the kinds of experiences that stretch our understanding, build our character, and increase our compassion for others." ~ Joseph B. Wirthlin

"The way we react to adversity can be a major factor in how happy and successful we can be in life." ~ Joseph B. Wirthlin

Yuck!!!

So... I haven't been feeling well for a while and I finally broke down and went to the doctor this week.


The diagnoses: Mono

The Cause: Definitely not kissing anybody!!! I couldn't even get a frog to kiss me right now! :)

The Treatment: - First of all the hardest for me - No more Marathon training. I am really not happy about that. This has been a really hard summer for me to train, but I was looking forward to that accomplishment.

Secondly - I am supposed to sleep! I almost laughed at the Dr., but he told me if I don't sleep I don't get better. Seems pretty simple but since my body is only used to 3-4 hours a night I thought this was going to be a hard one for me. He told me that I would want to sleep and he was right. I think I have been awake 2 1/2 hours of the last 18, and I am headed back to bed in a few.

I told the Dr. that I didn't have time for mono right now he just laughed and said that these things usually didn't consult schedules.

I guess that means no more kissing for me for a while !

Enough with the negative....It could always be worse. I am thankful that it isn't. I hope you are smiling!

"Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he's been robbed. Most putts don't drop. Most beef is tough. Most children grow up to be just people. ... Most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is like an old-time rail journey - delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for the ride" Gordon B. Hinckley

What A Week, What a Week: Temple Open House, Swine Flu, Girls Camp, And A Day with President and Sister Monson

ell.... It has been quite the week. Clear full of fun and excitement of course... What else would there be.

Last Saturday - I woke up feeling pretty sick, but I made it to our Ward Temple Session. It was fun to go with Kamila - My cousins wife, who is still new at the whole temple thing. It reminded me of how nervous I used to get. After the session we went to breakfast at Denny's - I decided that I would never make a good waitress. I am just not patient enough.

After breakfast I came home, feeling much worse, but I had so much to do to get ready for finals. So I tried to study, but honestly, not much really got inside my brain. I had to keep switching studying spots to keep myself awake.

Saturday evening we went to the Oquirrh Mountain Temple open house. I absolutely LOVE this temple. I loved the design, the decorations, furniture, it was all just beautiful. I am looking forward to going again with our Young Women in July. I love how all of the temples are unique and different, but all so beautiful.


I started feeling like I was going to throw up (Sorry for all the details) as we sat down in the sealing room where a very cute couple bore their testimony of the importance of the temple. Luckily I made it out of the temple before anything happened. The weather was really yucky and rainy so I decided that I just wanted to get home before I threw up, but I didn't make it. We only had to make one stop but still...

Saturday Night, Sunday and Monday & Tuesday I was sick in bed. We joked about it being swine flu - with the flu you only run a fever for 6 to 10 hours and then you feel alright but we think the fever came during the night when I was making phone calls at 3 am. (Sorry Amy) I really don't think it was. I am just glad it is over.

Of course I had to get sick the week of finals. Couldn't have happened at any other time could it? On Wednesday I took two finals, I did well on the first one, and bombed the other one, but I think I passed the class. I am just glad that they are over, and I have decided that I am going to take a break from school for a little while. I will start classes again in August. I am still not sure what I am going to do with my time, but I am sure I will figure it out.

The fun part of my week started on Thursday when I got to go to girls camp. I absolutely love the Heber Valley Girls Camp. It is so amazingly beautiful and reminds me so much of the mountains of home. I just love driving up there and being with the Young Women of my ward. I work with the best young women and leaders in the whole church. I was really bummed that I only got to spend one day there, but at least I got to spend that day.

They did a really neat thing this year. The theme was GEMS - Girls Embracing Moral Standards. Each ward had a different standard , a Gem associated with that standard, and a scripture that related to it. They gave us a challenge to memorize and pass off the scripture to each ward and once you completed all of them you were able to go pick an oyster and have it opened to get a pearl. It was a really touching experience to remind us that to our Heavenly Father we are treasures.
After a wonderful testimony meeting that our Young Women had planned we loaded up the van so I could bring most of the stuff home. Let's just say I am not sure we could have put much more in that car. It was packed pretty tight! Kudos to Jana & Myndi for packing it all in there. They did a great job!









Today I had a wonderful day! It was the final day of the new mission presidents conference at the MTC and so I got to go be security. My assignment was to help Sister Monson. I got to push her around in her wheel chair and set with her during the sacrament meeting. What a wonderful opportunity. I feel really blessed to be able to meet the prophet and his family. They are both really funny people. My heart is always full as I get to shake hands with him. It was neat to see some of the missionaries as we were going out to the cars so they could leave. They started to sing "We Thank Thee of God for a Prophet" How blessed we are to be led by a living prophet. I am very thankful that I have a testimony, that I know that our Heavenly Father speaks through his prophets. What a great day!
During his talk President Monson quoted James Barrie, who wrote " God gave us memories that we might have June roses in the December of our lives." This week I feel like that I have had a few of those June roses. I love you all and hope all is well. May your June Roses continue to bloom!

To My Dad

The world
doesn’t know him
as a hero,
but she knows differently.
He doesn’t always
say a lot,
but when he does,
she knows it is
worth remembering.
Even worth writing down.
But she never has to
write down anything
that her father says
because she knows
she’ll never forget.

Terri Cecil (adapted)



You may never know
what a difference
your quiet influence
and steady caring
have meant throughout my life...
how much your strong,
protective love and wisdom
have carried me through...

...but maybe you’ll understand
with your heart
what no words can ever tell you...

I Love You, Dad
Happy Father’s Day

Catch Up

So...Regardless of popular belief I have not fallen off the face of the earth (As much As I Would Like to). School and Work have been a little much the last month. What do you do? I am really thankful for the opportunity that I have to participate in both. Here are some pictures of my Nephew's Graduation & My sisters suprise party. It was fun to be in Arizona for a day or two. The time always flies by faster than I want it to. My poor sister fell & broke her wrist and her ankle the day after her birthday. We partied while she sat from her wheel chair and watched. I felt bad for her.

Hope all is well with you guys. Let me know if I can do anything for you.

Everyday

This week I was working on one of projects for my favorite class (Digital Media) - Pointless class for me to take, but at least it is easy since it is the second time I get to take it! (UVU didn't transfer my classes the way they should have been). At any rate, the project was a collage using digital media to describe me. I was trying to find a video clip of something, and I came across the music video for Everyday by Rascall Flats.

I don't think that I have cried so hard in weeks. It made me think of all the opportunities I miss to be that life-saver for people but filled my heart with gratitude when I thought of all of the people who have "Saved My Life". Of course there is my dear sweet family, both the current and past. There was the elementary school teacher who made me learn life lessons that were hard, the home teacher who wasn't affraid to care about me, the Young women leaders who took me out for ice cream on those hard days, The friends who weren't afraid to call my Mom to tell her about some stupid things I was doing, The high school teacher who encouraged me to be something, the College professor that showed me that there is more to life than myself, the friends and family who have cried for hours and hours with me as I faced disappointment of not bieng able to be a mom, and then with me again as I lost my whole world. There are the people who encouraged me to "find myself", the people who laugh with me when I do dumb stuff, Those who are patient with me when I am always grumpy, the Young women and leaders I serve with, ...if I kept listing my list would go on and on, but know that your name is on my list.

My point is, I have been so incredibly blessed by all of you. Because of your examples I have decided to re-evaluate a little, to look for opportunities to save the lives of those around me. Thank you for bieng the angels that I have needed you to be.

"I have spoken . . . of heavenly help, of angels dispatched to bless us in time of need. But when we speak of those who are instruments in the hand of God, we are reminded that not all angels are from the other side of the veil. Some of them we walk with and talk with—here, now, every day. Some of them reside in our own neighborhoods. Some of them gave birth to us, and in my case, one of them consented to marry me. Indeed heaven never seems closer than when we see the love of God manifested in the kindness and devotion of people so good and so pure that angelic is the only word that comes to mind."

~Jeffrey R. Holland,

"A real friend is like an angel who warms you by her presence and remembers you in her prayers"

Is it Saturday Yet???

What a wonderful weekend!! Crazy YES, but wonderful! I know this is supposed to be my few days off from school where I am trying to relax and enjoy life, but not much relaxing going on.


Thursday night my sisters drove into town. Friday morning we left for Twin Falls Idaho to go to Wyatt's wedding. The rest of the family was staying in Burley Thursday night so we stopped to say hi to them before heading up to Twin Falls. In the craziness of trying to get changed and help get kids in the car my keys got locked in the car. Luckily I had pulled out my purse that had my recommend and stuck it in my trunk which was open. Thank Heavens. We were able to just pile in others cars and go to the temple. The sealing was so nice and the temple was so pretty. I was so glad that I could make it. Wyatt has always been the little brother I never got.

The weather didn't work very well with us, although it didn't start raining until they were almost done with pictures. The wind made all of the pictures turn out splendid. We were going for the wind blown look.

After the sealing we drove out to see the falls. While I hated the drive (Narrow Winding canyon) the end result was worth it. I have always loved waterfalls, and these were completely breathtaking. It was raining so we didn't get to stay very long, but maybe someday I can get back there.

After our little detour we went back to Burley where we had a fabulous winter day lunch. Luckily Uncle Oliver has opened a few cars after the keys got locked in them before, but I must say I was very impressed. I think he had my car unlocked in less than 5 minutes. The reception that night was in Burley, it was fun to have a minute to visit with all of the family that was there. That night we made it home about 12:00, yes Shane and Mathew I realize I was driving faster than the speed limit, but you were going slow.

Saturday morning we woke up early - it wasn't very bright, but wasn't that rain pretty. The agenda for the morning was to make 8 cheese cakes for the reception before noon. The magic ladies made cheese cakes & Mandy even got a salad done. My job - washing dishes. They know better than to let me cook.

One of my cousins was baptized on Saturday at noon. I think I was a little on the tired side because I started crying during the opening song. I have always loved the "rainbows" song. It gave me that new determination because I to want my life to be as clean as earth right after rain, to be the best I can so that I can live with my Heavenly Father again. Sorry- crying again. Trevor & Mandy you did a great job with your talks, thanks for making me cry harder.

After the baptism we started the decorating frenzy. The flowers that were ordered for the center pieces looked terrible, so thankfuly a dear sweet sister in our ward had red tulips in her yard that she was willing to share. Prayers are answered people. After a couple of mad dashes to Walmart we pulled it off, but as Cristal said "we lived at the church" yesterday. I thought the decorations turned out nice, even if the food table wasn't asymetrical.

The reception went really well. It was really good to see a lot of people that were there. I am so glad that family from out of town got to come. I loved seeing them all as well as ward members that I don't normally get to see. It was a long night, but a lot of fun.



This morning I went to Moab with my sisters to meet my Mom who wasn't able to come because my Dad got called into work. She had to bring Stef's car, because Stef is moved (Still in the process) up here! I am so exited to have her here.

It has been an incredibly long weekend with way to much driving, but I have loved almost every minute of it. It is raining outside now, and I love the rain, it reminds me to be better, just like after baptism. Have a great day!

The Best Final So Far

Finals are over!!!

(at least for this semester)

So, after a very stressful week of studying, trying to remember everything (or learn) everything I was supposed to for the semester I am finally done. You are all free to do the happy dance with me if you would like.

This semester I was so happy I actually got to take an education class - which I absolutly loved. The Professor - Tom was a great guy who works as a Junior High guidance councilor. Such a fun class. While the class was on adolesent development he encouraged us to learn how to help kids to see that change is possible. Sorry - I am rambling, bottom line, great class.

The reason behind the title for the post...

For our final in Tom's class he showed us a short clip from Dewitt Jones, a photographer for the National Geographic. The title of the clip was "Celebrating What's Right with the World". When I first saw it I thought - yah right - has this guy watched the news lately. But he soon changed my mind. Here are some things that he said that I loved:

• Celebrate What's Right with the World




• When I was growing up, I used to hold that maxim - - I won't believe it, until I see it. Yet the more I shot for the Geographic the more I realized I had it backwards. That the way it really works is - - I won't see it, till I believe it. That's the way life works.




• Vision controls our perception, and our perception becomes reality




• Instead of starting out as we so often do by griping about what's wrong with the situation...what's right with the situation?




• ...The very thing that so often frightens us today - that awesome change curve we hear so much about -- is really my ally.




• The power of vision is extraordinary - -We have to be willing to trust it, to come out to our edge, because it here on the edge that we find the winds to take us higher.




• that edges is between being the best in the world and being the best for the world.




• There's no use walking anywhere to preach, unless your walking is your preaching


• You just have to do it and believe




• If we look for it and believe it is there we will have a vision that fills us with energy, takes us to our own edge and gives us the courage to soar.

http://www.celebratetraining.com/ - You can watch the video.

What a nice burst of fresh air it was. I love to hear things that inspire me, and this one did just that. My goal is to celebrate and look for the positives in life, instead of wallowing in what is wrong which is what I normally do.

I am really looking forward to the 5 days off before I start school again. I am only doing 4 classes in the next five weeks. It should be really fun!

P.S. - I got a 100% on the final, all because I commented on the film. I love those kind of finals!

Going Home

On Monday night on my way home from work I drove past a house that made me smile. The house was beautiful in and of itself, but the yard and the front of the house was covered in Yellow Ribbons with a huge sign that said "Welcome Home Jason". For a minute I was jealous of Jason, whoever he was. I love that feeling of pulling into the driveway knowing that Mom or whoever is at home is going to come out to greet me, that feeling of overwhelming love and comfort, that feeling of peace and safety.

The rest of the way home I thought about my experiences of going to different places I call home, with my final thought being of what it was going to be like to go to my final "home". What would that reunion be like? Does Heaven have yards covered with yellow ribbons to welcome us home? Will we be met by people we love? Will we feel that overwhelming love and peace? I hope so.

After the sweet feelings that I had about Heaven, I had the thought that if I were to go today how unprepared I am. I thought of all of the things I still need to learn, the habits and attributes I need to get rid of and those that I want gain and develop. There are people I need to learn to love and those I need to forgive.

How thankful I am for the blessing that I receive every day to try a little bit better to become the person that Heavenly Father sees me as. I know that there must be days when he pounds his head against the wall thinking "Is she ever going to get this one right", but still he waits patiently leading me along. I know that I have a very long way to go, but hopefully I keep getting the chance to become. My desire is to live my life so when that final day comes that I will have a great homecoming as well. I hope that on that day My Father will say "Well done my good and faithful daughter"

“Nothing is going to startle us more when we pass through the veil to the other side than to realize how well we know our Father and how familiar his face is to us.”

President Ezra Taft Benson

Happy Easter

I just wanted to take a few minutes before the fun moments of the weekend hit to wish you all a Happy Easter. I hope that you enjoy your weekend, and that you have a chance to reflect on the reason for the celebrations.

My sister reminded me today of the quote "There would be no Christmas if there had not been Easter." -Gordon B. Hinckley

How thankful I am for the events that we celebrate at Easter. For the life of Christ, The Atonement, and the Resurrection.

I love the quote by Elder Ballard "...he had the power to save, and he loved his Son, and he could have saved him. He might have rescued him from the insult of the crowds. He might have rescued him when the crown of thorns was placed upon his head. He might have rescued him when the Son, hanging between the two thieves, was mocked with, “Save thyself, and come down from the cross. He saved others; himself he cannot save.” He listened to all this. He saw that Son condemned; he saw him drag the cross through the streets of Jerusalem and faint under its load. He saw that Son finally upon Calvary; he saw his body stretched out upon the wooden cross; he saw the cruel nails driven through hands and feet, and the blows that broke the skin, tore the flesh, and let out the life’s blood of his Son. He looked upon that.

In the case of our Father, the knife was not stayed, but it fell, and the life’s blood of his Beloved Son went out. His Father looked on with great grief and agony over his Beloved Son, until there seems to have come a moment when even our Savior cried out in despair: “My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?”

In that hour I think I can see our dear Father behind the veil looking upon these dying struggles until even he could not endure it any longer; and, like the mother who bids farewell to her dying child, has to be taken out of the room, so as not to look upon the last struggles, so he bowed his head, and hid in some part of his universe, his great heart almost breaking for the love that he had for his Son. Oh, in that moment when he might have saved his Son, I thank him and praise him that he did not fail us, for he had not only the love of his Son in mind, but he also had love for us. I rejoice that he did not interfere, and that his love for us made it possible for him to endure to look upon the sufferings of his Son and give him finally to us, our Savior and our Redeemer."

I add my thanks to Elder Ballard. What a blessing this part of the plan of happiness is in my life. I can't help but stand all amazed, to think that Our Loving Father would send His Son to die for us. And to know that even if it had been just for me, My Saviour still would have come and suffered and died. Just For Me. I know that he didn't come just for me, but for you as well.

I know that My Saviour, My Brother, My Friend suffered not only for my sins, but also for my pains, my sicknesses and my sorrows; I know he has "Takin my lickings for me" (Thank you Hancock Family for the sweet memory of your Dad).

I know he lives, and that he loves us, that he rose from the tomb. I am not sure what kind of mansion my actions are building me, but I know that I can't wait to kneel before my Savior to thank him for all that he has done and all that he continues to do.

I hope you enjoy this little clip. It is long, but well worth the watch. I hope that you feel the peace that comes from knowing that we are not alone in this life, and that our brother, Jesus Christ lived a perfect live, suffered, died and was resurrected all for us.

Happy Easter!

If you don't laugh you're gonna cry...

My Day:

Left at 5am to take a friend to the Airport so she could go to Phoenix - She is going on a trip that I was supposed to go on, but "I am too valuable to be out of the office for 2 days". (I am not bitter).

Drove to the airport in a mini blizzard

Took the "Short-cut" backroads home. - Took me an extra 40 minutes to get home - Thanks Josh!

Decided to lay down for 5 minutes when I got home from the airport - Woke up An hour and a half later. Didn't make it to work until 11.

Got in a serious argument with the boss lady - Never good, but had been a long time coming

Shredded a document that I have been working on getting completed for months - it had signatures from My contractor in Massachusetts. It took me forever to get him to sign it.

Working until 10pm - just ran around in circles today, too much to do, not enough time (Especially when I don't come to work at a decent hour)

Managed to spill a cup of avocado ranch dressing ALL OVER - it made a huge mess, made my office stink, made me want to vomit



This was after I had most of the mess cleaned up. - But notice the bend in the knee, I haven't been able to do that for a while! :)

It could be worse, I could have to do it all again tomorrow. But still I am wondering...Why exactly did I get out of bed this morning?

For Good

I absolutely love the musical Wicked. I have wanted to see it on for the last two years, but I haven't made it there yet. This morning while I was getting ready for work (Very Late I might add) one of the songs came on my Ipod. I decided that I was going to look and see if I could find any reasonable priced tickets to the show. Tonight I logged onto KSL - the cheapest tickets that would work for my over-booked schedule were $200 a piece!!! So I freaked out a little bit, and went to the wicked web sight to see if there was another place close that I could catch the show at. Of course it is showing in Tempe in July (tickets go on sale 4/1/09), but my July is already completely packed with a trip already to AZ, but I don't think I could make it work and even if I could that means I would have to fly instead of drive - the plane ticket would be over $200. (Six in one hand, 1/2 dozen in the other).

Anyway....

I was really frustrated thinking I am going to miss it again this tour. I was checking out the Wicked the musical web sight and looked at some of the video's which really got me exited to see it. I am not sure how I made it there, but I got to a page that had a video of the composer Stephen Schwartz discussing the theme song - For Good. http://www.wickedday.com/videos-SS-pt4-web.html

When writing the song Stephen asked his daughter what she would say to her life long friend if she knew she was never going to see her again. The first verse was her response.

For Good has been a special song in my heart. Watching this video made me think of all of the the special people who have changed my life for good. There have been people who have quoted it to me, and times that I have used it to say goodbye to people and used it. I am sitting here crying just thinking about all of you wonderful people.

I love the words of the song:

(Glinda):
I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true
But I know I'm who I am today
Because I knew you...

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good

(Elphaba):
It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend...

Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you

(Glinda):
Because I knew you

(Both):
I have been changed for good

(Elphaba):
And just to clear the air
I ask forgiveness
For the things I've done you blame me for

(Glinda):
But then, I guess we know
There's blame to share

(Both):
And none of it seems to matter anymore

(Glinda):
Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood

(Elphaba):
Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a bird in the wood

(Both):
Who can say if I've been
Changed for the better?
I do believe I have been
Changed for the better

(Glinda):
And because I knew you...

(Elphaba):
Because I knew you...

(Both):
Because I knew you...
I have been changed for good...


I know that I have been so blessed to have so many wonderful people in my life. Some have stayed for only a short time, and some of you are there for forever. My thanks goes to all of you tonight, thank you for leaving your handprints on my heart. I know that I am not the easist person to deal with sometimes, but because I know you... I have been changed for good.


A little background on this post:

First - I am not sure if it is the long hours at work lately, the changes that I know that are shortly coming (YW) or whatever else it could possibly be, but I have felt a little emotional lately.

Second - My friends at work call me a walking gieco commercial. They laugh because there is usually a song that I can sing that relates to our conversation. Call me crazy, but that is me.

Our Time to Stand

This morning I had the opportunity to go to the temple with some of my dear sweet friends. As I was waiting for the session to start (We were late, I was supposed to pick everyone up at 6:30 and I was using a clock that hadn't switched to daylight savings time yet - still feel bad about that sorry ladies!) ...I had a thought about an e-mail that I received from several diffrent people based on the HBO show Big Love. My heart felt a little bad for those who are so set on trying to mock something I hold very dear and sacred. I am so very thankful for the covenants that I have made in the temple, and for the blessings and promised that I have received there. It truly is the our Father's house.



This whole week I have thought about how this is as President Hinkley told us it would be the time to “Stand a little taller and work a little harder and value a little greater the marvelous blessing which you have as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. That membership will bring with it a strong and moving testimony of the divinity of the Son of God, the Savior of the world, the Lord Jesus Christ.

“You and I are sons and daughters of God, with something of divinity within us. Let us stand tall, my brothers and sisters. Let us live the gospel. Let us be busy in the Church. Let us learn of its doctrine. Let us feed upon its teachings. Let us grow in faith and faithfulness before the world” (meeting, Cairns, Australia, 26 Jan. 2000).

May we find strength in each other as we stand together and lift those around us.

My HATE HATE relationship with Day Light Savings

I was raised in Arizona where as my dad likes to say (Please don't be offended) we only have White Mans Time - meaning no day light savings. Since I have lived in Utah I have always had a huge issue with the time change. This year I swore it was going to be different, but here I am looking at the clock that says 11:54, but knowing in my head that it is really 10:54 and I have been up since 3am (White Man's Time). Since my body knows that I still have a good 3 hours before I am going to go to bed, but my mind is done thinking science so I decided to finish my taxes and look at my blog. I was successful in completing my taxes (Always fun to get a refund) and decided to attack my blog. I was looking for a fun festive background and somehow managed to delete my entire template. Everything cute and fun about my blog is gone. I think I know how I did it, but it isn't letting me go back and change it. I know there is another reason for my mistake, but I am blaming it on day-light savings I still hate it! It will be better in the fall - I will get to add another hour of sleep :)

I guess it gives me a reason to give my blog a face lift, it just might take me a little while.

Well...

I don't know if this needs a disclaimer or not, but I am not telling you this to make you feel bad for me, but to simply make you laugh! Please laugh with me!

See this lady:



She looks nice right, even has the puppy in the picture to make her seem sweet. Let me just tell you, she isn't very nice! For the last few weeks I have been participating in a contest to get healthy. One of the requirements of the contest is that you exercise 30 min every day. Well I am a big sucker for most things and so a year ago I recieved an advertisment to get fit with Jillian Michaels. I did a little research and decided she had a pretty good program so I ordered her DVD's. Well to be honest they have been setting on my shelf for a year! Anyway I decided to use her program as part of my exercising for the contest. Miss Jillian does not know the meaning of the work easy workout. My favorite DVD is the 30 day shred, which promises that if you do the workout for 30 days you will be shreded and look great by the time you are done. Well I have been doing it for 2 weeks now, and I am still on level one, just barely getting to the full intensity of the program. At any rate - on Wednesday night I was working hard trying to keep the intensity up until the very last minute and I came down out of a little kick boxing move and landed really really hard on my knee and kind of slipped back on it. Not exactly sure what I did but it started to hurt really bad after that. On Thursday I limped around looking like a dummy, and on Friday I was in real pain. The professionals said that I didn't rip anything which was good for me. They got me a brace, told me to take IB profen, Do Ice & Heat Therepy and stay off of it. As you all know I am not very good at listening - I did do the Ice & Heat therapy (Thank you Amy) and I kept the brace on, but staying off of it and & the Drug thing. Yeah I am just not very good with all of that. On Saturday Oliver brought me home another enemy that is supposed to be a friend:



Although I have been able to get around a lot faster, I am not sure if I like them. Now here is the funny part. Last night after stake confrence I was coming home and there are 4 steps to get into my house. I was trying to get in the house as quickly as I could and getting frustrated with the crutches because I couldn't figure out how to get up the stairs with them and my nieghbor was behind me trying to help me up the stairs and I didn't want to make people wait on me so I just jumped or at least tried to. Landing firmly on my dumb knee. Although I wasn't laughing at the time I am now. I am sure that it would have been hillarious for anybody to watch!



Here are a few tips to help you bring laughter to the surface during tough times.

-Find humour in all things. Recognize the absurdity or ridiculousness of situations and circumstances.

-Laugh at yourself. Be a little silly, over-exaggerate your simple mistakes, embellish a few of your shortcomings

-Be spontaneous. The element of surprise is priceless, improvise and act on the unexpected



“A merry heart doeth good like a medicine” (Prov. 17:22). Humor allows us to view our lives in a more positive light, deal with personal conflicts and intolerance, and cope with trials and frustrations that might otherwise seem overwhelming. As we are told in Ecclesiastes, there is “a time to laugh” (Eccl. 3:4)

May you all have something to laugh at. Remember that life is way to short not to enjoy it!

Simple Prayers & Small Miracles

I have always joked used the joke: When they were handing out the brains in heaven I thought they said trains - and I didn't really like trains so I skipped that line. As funny as that is I think it is completely true about my domestic ability. I am very blessed to have 4 sisters who have all of the domestic skills a girl could possibly want, and then there is me. But I have learned that that is okay, we can't all be domestic, there has to be someone to drive the car (Of course I don't do that well either... Oh well:)). At any rate, tonight was our New Beginnings for Young Women and my assignment was the decorations. The Lord gives us opportunities to make weak things strong right. Anyway I found something that I thought would be really cute for a centerpiece for the table ordered and kind of forgot about the rest of my assignment. Well on Tuesday I was starting to worry a little because my centerpiece still hadn't made it yet. I tried to track it down to see if had been shipped and it had but not delivered yet. On Friday morning I prayed pretty intently that my centerpiece would show up, but that if it didn't I would be inspired to know what to do otherwise. On Saturday after the mail came and the centerpiece didn't show up, and I was a little freaked out so I said another simple little prayer, called at least 10 people to see if my idea would be good enough and headed to the store. Of course once I got to the store my idea changed at least 3 times but here is the finished product:




Moral of the story:
I couldn't have come up with something like this on my own. I know that there are alot of other women who could have done a much better job with this, but Heavenly Father wanted to give me the opportunity to grow a little. Though some might think this prayer was a silly and insignificant prayer, Heavenly Father knew it was something important to me and he answered it. I am so grateful for the small miracles that happen when I put my faith and trust in the Lord. Thanks to all those who were patient with me while I called a million times a day, and those who helped me put it all together. You guys are great!

Reflection

On Saturday I was bribing Mirra to let me do her hair and her movie of choice was Cars. I love love this movie and so while the hair job wasn't the easiest (She hates having it combed) I was okay with it taking a little bit of time. Cars reminds me so much of home - (Jackrabbit & The Wigwam). The thing that I love the most about it is the Brad Paisley song that was written for it - Find Yourself. I am not sure exactly when this movie came out, but I don't think I really watched it until after I moved to Utah - so after my divorce. Maybe this is why this song hit me so hard.

When you find yourself
In some far off place,
And it causes you
To rethink some things.
You start to sense
That slowly you’re becoming someone else
And then you find yourself.

When you make new friends
In a brand new town,
And you start to think
About settling down,
The things that would have been lost on you
Are now clear as a bell.
And you find yourself
That’s when you find yourself.

We go though life
So sure of where we’re heading,
And then we wind up lost
And it’s the best thing that could happen.
Sometimes when you lose your way
It’s really just as well.
Because you find yourself;
Yeah that’s when you find yourself.

This weekend I have had a lot of time to think about that. I know that "getting lost" was one of the hardest things I will ever have to face, but I am really a different person because of it. I guess I am still in the process of finding myself, but how thankful I am for the journey.I know that Heavenly Father knows that I am still working on it, and he is constantly giving me opportunities to learn something new about myself, to expand my talents, to grow. Hopefully soon I will find myself as the person I want to be. Thanks to all of you who are patient with me as I get there. You are the best!

"Though no-one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new end." - Unknown

Ready, Set, Go!

Yesterday my cute friend Amy & I started on our journey to the Top of Utah Marathon. We did a fun walk at UVU - The NO Snow 5K. It was literally through the halls of UVU. It was a little bit unorganized but still a fun walk, and I think I have caught the running bug again. It is really hard to run during the winter with all of the snow up here and I absolutely hate running on the treadmill, but the snow is pretty much gone. I have 1 month to get in shape before I start running for real with the formal training starting the end of May. I am so exited that Amy is going to run with us!

Days like this

One of my favorite quotes is by Sherri Dew "Mother said there would be days like this, but she didn't mention they would last for weeks or months".

It seems like I have been a lotta bit grumpy for the last few weeks, and I am really sorry for that. I found a story tonight that gave me a little hope and I thought I would share it with you.
--------

Refiner's fire

Some time ago, a few ladies met to study the scriptures. While reading the third chapter of Malachi, they came upon a remarkable expression in the third verse:

"And He (God) shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver" ( Malachi 3:3 ).

One lady decided to visit a silversmith to learn about the process of refining silver. After the smith had described it to her, she asked, "But Sir, do you sit while the work of the refining is going on?"

"Oh yes, Madam," replied the silversmith; " I must sit with my eye steadily fixed on the furnace for if the time necessary for refining be exceeded in the slightest degree, the silver will be injured."

The lady at once saw the beauty, and comfort too, of the expression, "He shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver."

God sees it needful to put His children into a furnace; His eye is steadily intent on the work of purifying, and His wisdom and love are both engaged in the best manner for us. Our trials do not come at random, and He will not let us be tested beyond what we can endure.

Before she left, the lady asked one final question, "When do you know the process is complete?"

"Why that is quite simple," replied the silversmith. "When I can see my own image in the silver, the refining process is finished."



----------
I hope this finds you all well & happy. Please let me know if I can do anything for you.

Conversations of today:

Called home to check in with Mom - Heather picks up the phone. The person I wanted to talk too :)

Heather: Hi Sis, how are you?
Me: I have never had a migrane, but I think I might

Heather: Does your head hurt so bad you wish someone would shoot you and just be done with it.
Me: Yes

Heather: Sometimes there is light headedness, and you hate light
Me: Yep

Heather: You have a migrane, go back to bed!

a few hours later

Cristal: Bec, why are you sick every weekend?
Me: I don't know but I am really starting to get sick of it.

Could it possibly be that school is busy, work is busy, life is busy, and I don't ever get any sleep. Maybe, but what do you do about it.

The Last Two Weeks

So I took off two weeks of work, school, life pretty much everything and went on a road trip to AZ which was wonderful. I forgot to take my camera cord with me (Explains the million posts tonight) It was so much fun to see everybody down there and get to spend a little time. I loved the trip I got to visit some fantastic people down there that I don't get to see a whole lot. Thank you to the Randy & Wendy, Ralph & Janet, Sheila & Fred, Len & Maricel, And all of my darling friends who let me come crash at their house for a little while. I also got to go out to Trappers for hot chocolate, Chef Salad & Pie (Thanks Kaelee & Jensen) and to Eva's for a much missed Chimichanga with Jalapeno Cream Cheese Sauce (Even if it did make me throw up).

Another Highlight was the mini reunion we had with some of the girls from High school.


Sorry for the one's we missed. (I don't think I look good in anyone's picutures - I am blaming it on the couch, I think it was like the chair and trying to eat me:)) THanks Stephanie for putting this together.

I am really sorry that I missed a lot of you on my visit. I wish Utah wasn't so far away sometimes.

I guess I have to go back to reality tomorrow. Work (Two people quit while I was gone :( and school - I just had to change my schedule for Young Womens - meaning - I have class every morning at 7 am. NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO THAT ONE! Hope all is well with you, and that you guys all had a wonderful christmas and that you have a fabulous christmas. Love Ya!