Because We Have Today...(Nothing Wordless About it)

Can I tell you a secret...Okay it's not really a secret, especially if you know me.  I LOVE MUSIC. Tonight I had a particularly amazing musical experience, one that I plan on talking about for a long while, but I it brought some thoughts that I just feel like need to be shared.  With that said...YOU NEED TO GO BUY HILARY WEEKS NEW CD!!! Buy it now, it will make more sense when I talk about it later.  And if you buy it before October 29th you save some $$.  Who doesn't love that!  Back to the post:

8 weeks ago my life changed. 

It changed completely.

It changed Forever.

It has been the most difficult change I have ever faced.  

I was in the second week of my fall semester, sitting in the middle of an institute class, talking about how the gospel of Jesus Christ gives us the strength to endure to the end, when my phone buzzed letting me know I had a new text message. Of course I ignored it and thought it was no big deal, the class was almost over.

As I stood up to leave the Institute building and head back up the hill to my next class I started reading the message. Honestly I didn't get it. I couldn't comprehend it.

Accident

Dad

Helicopter

CPR

I immediately called my sister Heather who had sent the text, both she and I were in tears and then came the uncontrollable screams. My Dad was gone.

Over the last 8 weeks there have been many miracles and tender mercies in our family, but there have also been some extremely hard challenges that we have been faced with.

One of the hardest of those challenges for me was realizing that I didn't get to tell my Dad goodbye.  I took for granted the fact that He would always be there, anytime I needed Him.  Almost daily I realize yet another area where I counted on my Dad, where I needed his opinion, where I depended on His inspiration.  Again, almost daily I have the thought to call Dad, but making that call isn't possible now.  Every day I still miss Him, I still cry, and it's still hard.  I know that my life is never going to be the same.

When I was on my way to Arizona the night I lost my Dad I remember sending a text message to my friend Drew, asking him how I was supposed to get through this.  His response is something that I have to remind myself on an almost daily basis "Take deep breaths, be thankful for the family that you do have, and spend time serving them"  Honestly, one of the best tidbits of advice I have received, something that it brought to mind A LOT. Of course, I am a pro at the deep breaths at this point, but still struggling with the gratitude and serving, but something I am working at.  (Thanks again Drew)

Back to Tonight... I went to the release concert for Hilary Weeks new cd "Every Step". (THANK YOU KALEB)  In the middle of all of her FABULOUS new stuff she pulled out this "oldy but goody" as she called it.  "If I Only Had Today", (you can listen to it by clicking on the music player on my sidebar on the left - it's the first song). Of course my first thought was that sad rememberence that I didn't get to say goodbye to Dad, but as Hilary continued to sing my heart was softened a bit. Instead of thinking "wo is me" I was filled with a sweet comfort and the thoughts Drew shared with me came back into my head...."spend time serving them".

Because of the experiences of the last 8 weeks my today's mean so much more.  I am trying not to take the people who I hold dear for granted.  I would like to think I am more patient, more forgiving, more loving.  More eager to serve those around me, and slower in making rash judgments. I am trying to be more grateful for the small blessings in my life-the hugs, the smiles, the simple hello's. Because of the last 8 weeks I am trying to be more prayerful and spend more "knee time" asking how I can be an instrument in the Lord's hands and then following the promptings given. Because I have today, I am trying to be more like my Dad, more tenderhearted, more Christlike. Because I have today, I am trying to live the kind of life he would want me to live.

So can you do me a favor? 

 Because you have today... 

take that few minutes and tell your Dad you love him, do something kind for your Mom, spend some time with your kids, call that sister, text that nephew.  Let someone know how much you appreciate them in your life.  Do those things that you have on your "someday list"

  Remember that today is our gift and we never know when we won't have them anymore. 

“A hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in, or the kind of car I drove...but the world may be different because I was important in the life of a child.”

Forest E. Witcraft

I think that can be said if we are important in the life of anyone. 

 If I Only Had Today

Hilary Weeks

It seems like I've watched a million sunsets

and stared at a thousand full moons

Sometimes it feels like I've been here forever

and sometimes it all feels brand new.

I could never count the heartbeats

from the day I was born until now

But not a single one goes unnoticed 

by Him who breaths life in me somehow.  

But If there were no more tomorrows

I knew that I could not stay

I know how I'd spend every minute,

If I only Had today.

I'd hold you and listen 

I'd let the dishes set in the sink.

I'd tell you I love you over and over

and for once I'd just let the phone ring. 

Then I'd remind you of forever 

and how our love would never change

If I only had today.

I'd wake up before the sun did

and I'd watch as you quietly sleep

I'd pray for time to move slowly

knowing the moment won't keep

All the gifts that heaven has given

every blessing that's come my way

Wouldn't mean anything without you

So if I only had today...

I'd hold you and listen 

I'd memorize every detail of your face

I'd tell you I loved you over and over

I wouldn't let excuses get in the way.

Then I'd remind you of forever 

and how our love would never change

If I only had today.

There's no time like the present

Life doesn't come with any guaranties

The sun will set, time won't wait

so while I have today...

I'll hold you and listen

I'll let the dishes set in the sink.

I'll tell you I love you over and over

For once I'd just let the phone ring. 

I'll remind you of forever 

and how our love will never change

Because I have today.

Because I have today. 

How thankful I am for all of the WONDERFUL Memories of yesterday's that help me get through the Today's without my Dad.  

I Love You Dad.